Ninja rolls

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Change is never easy and transition is a (slow) process.

I think I currently resemble one of those travel suitcases that have been plastered with many stickers from all over the world – not because I’ve been travelling extensively – but rather, because I’ve had various stickers stuck to me. If I were to count them all on one hand, I’d need at least 7 fingers…which would make for a very odd looking hand. What I’ve done over the last year and a bit is I’ve sort of ‘ninja-rolled’ into different statuses (really, the plural of status should be stati…just seems so much nicer….but I digress): I’ve gone from single girl to long-distance dater; permanently employed to casually employed; long-distance dater to long-distance fiancé; casually employed to retrenched and unemployed; long-distance fiancé to long-distance wife; sane to insane; unemployed to employed in a company that speaks a language I have yet to master; living by myself to sharing an apartment (and everything else) with another person; South African citizen to Immigrant in Germany; once a native, now a foreigner…

Unfortunately for me, sprinkle a slight tendency to be negative, sad and anxious to this, and you have someone who’s just completely overwhelmed and seems constantly frazzled. You see, in my mind, I had this all figured out. I’d arrive in Berlin and voilà!..all would be ok with the world! But it’s not like that, and I’ve had to come to the realisation myself that all these changes require some getting used to…and getting used to them requires some time…and that time requires a whoooooole lot of patience (and understanding, and prayer, and tears, and smiles, and tissues, and comfort food…).

But hey, life is full of seasons right? And this is just one of mine…and soon there will be another. But let’s hope by the time the next one rolls in, I’ll have learned a thing or two…

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5 responses »

  1. You are a brave girl! And you have quite a story to tell already! Keep going for it – so excited about what the future has to hold! 🙂

  2. Hey Carms, I know what you mean about wanting everything to be right straight away… I’m just like that. Just keep reminding yourself that you are following your dream. You did it Girl!!! I also left everything and followed a boy I’d only been dating for 4 months… 10 years later and we are happily married. I always thought I’d rather go, give it a try and if it does not work out so be it. But rather that then wonder for the rest of your life what if…

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